We’ve all been there. You find these amazing new people to hang out with and talk to. You make memories to cherish. You go places with them. Then, when it’s time to leave, the goodbyes sadden you. A week on, WhatsApp and Instagram are your saviours, helping you stay in touch, at least indirectly. Then the messages get fewer and further apart. The stories on Instagram are no longer relevant to you. They move on and leave you behind. The invitations home and the future plans all turn to dust blowing past your face as you desperately attempt to catch up. And so you just stop. Stop to catch your breath. Stop for a final wave goodbye. And you take a different path.
Or do you? Why is it that we feel people don’t care about us when they stop talking to us? People always need a reason to talk to you. People have lives. People have other people. They can’t afford to stop and think about you everyday. The messages might get fewer and further apart, but that doesn’t mean the memories have faded away. People do care. People do remember. People change, yes, but who you are to them, that doesn’t change. So when you stop to catch your breath, remember, catching up isn’t what you’re supposed to do. You have your own path to follow. And somewhere in the future, closer than you think, paths are bound to intersect. And when they do, all the memories, all the emotions, they come rushing back. In that moment, you realise, love isn’t temporary.
People leave. But they leave not to leave you behind.
I’m the type of person who expects negative outcomes- a pessimist. This helps me deal with failure. To plan contingencies. To not be disappointed. And so far, it has done me plenty good.
But I figure, one must aspire to be something, to do something worthwhile. Preparing for negative outcomes is, in a way, feckless. Aspirations drive the force of will within us. Doesn’t matter if you’re implacable or resistant to change- good things need to happen. Oftentimes I notice that preparing for the worst brings out the worst in both us and the situation at hand. Think about it. Every time you do that, you’re simmering your spirits. You’re telling them something is incapable of happening or that you’re incapable of making it.
Also, not every outcome is bad. And not every outcome is good. It’s a balance. But why prepare for the bad when you can prep for the good? It would certainly pull up your spirits and your attitude. It might even push you to work harder for the light at the end of the tunnel.
Have some positivity. Ask and thou shalt receive. Thoughts and emotions have power, and you have the responsibility to manage them. Good things always come. Bad things may be good things in disguise.
So always, aspire to achieve. It doesn’t matter if it takes a little more time.
Another year over. 365 days of triumph, happiness, sorrow, struggles, highs and lows. For most of us though, it was just another dreary year of doing the same things over and over again.
When will we be rid of the monotony? When will we just stop…just stop and take a moment to see the world around us…see it and not just look? Will it ever happen?
I took such a moment towards the end of 2017. I reflected on the things that I see but notice everyday. Pain, loss, death, tragedy. From hundreds of people out in warzones to the tiny sapling in our backyard, struggling to exist. It is just poetically sad.
World peace will never exist. That is an absolute truth. Like how there can never be an ideal machine that is 100% efficient. It is one of those things coded into the weave of existence by the creator (whoever/whatever).
But we can get awfully close to it by simply extending our love of life, our desire for a better world and our passion for everything in it- by simply extending all of that to the dozen people we talk to everyday. It isn’t hard. It is gratifying. It is like how Portia from the Merchant of Venice puts it- “Mercy is twice blessed. It blesseth him that gives and him that receives.”
The smallest things make the biggest difference. Let us, together, hand in hand, make the world a better place as every day of 2018 goes by. One conversation- at the right place and time- can change lives. One hug. One handshake. One smile.
One love. #2018
Remember when we were half as tall as we are, when we said what we thought and meant it?
Boy, are those days over. Now, every sentence uttered is riddled with ulterior meanings and innuendo; truth never betrayed to the subject. Never ones are we to serve the churning soups inside our heads. The face isn’t really the index of the mind (at least the mouth isn’t).
No, we care too much about our made-up ‘image’ and ‘prestige’ and ‘integrity’ to share what we think in an honest manner. It’s like clothing, in a way. We want to wear what everyone else is wearing. Whatever is ‘in’. Such is the will to blend in that it masks (if not replaces) our actual desires.
With every interaction, the mind makes some adjustments to the equation and its variables. To speak up (introverts), to shut up (extroverts, or in some cases, introverts trying to be normal), to be more direct, to beat about more.
Ugh. People are so difficult. Communication, one of the basic constructs of life and civilisation, is such a confounding thing, isn’t it?
It goes to justify the burning desire to marry our beds and stay on them for years on end.
Thinking back to days past
Wishing to rewrite the tale
Hoping to relieve the pain
Trying to grab the reins
But in thinking
One forgets that pain is natural
That sorrow is black to the white
That regret is part of the tale.
“What do you want in life?”
“Where do you see yourself in 10 years?”
“What do you want to achieve?”
“What is your goal?”
Silly questions encountered far too often.
Of course, one has to prepare oneself for the future, but that doesn’t necessarily warrant having a ‘goal’ or a final point one must reach.
I don’t have a goal; doesn’t mean I’m aimless. I shall continue to do whatever I like doing. I’m in control of my life.
Whatever happened to YOLO and living in the present?
It is a question a lot of people, including yourself, ask you. What do you say?
Your name. Where you’re from. What you’ve studied. Where you work. And so on.
While this might suffice as an answer to the average nature of said question, none of it is explanatory of your core identity. I.e., your roots- who you are.
Seldom, for short moments of time, you feel like you belong. To the people around you. To the place where you are. To the world. To yourself.
It has nothing to do with where you are from, what religion you follow or what your parents do. It is much more abstract than that. Much less explainable.
It is when you are in touch with your roots.
It is when you are you.
When you are truly fulfilled in every sense.
“Time heals” I was told.
No it doesn’t. It may provide temporary distractions. But it will never have you forget what you loved and lost.
Maybe you’re not meant to. Maybe you’re supposed to remember.
After all, memories of them are what you have left.
Painful, aren’t they?
Just wake me up when it’s all over.
Two friends talking to each other.
The replies are usually late- they both have lives, after all.
But each conversation has a ‘sorry’ and a ‘thank you’ tagging along. Does it mean they are not really very close?
No. Quite the opposite. They care too much about bothering one another. But why?
Maybe life is simple. Maybe we are all just paying too much attention to the littlest things.
Maybe we’re just overthinking it.